The Fourth is not with me
I forgot that today is the designated Star Wars holiday - the anniversary of the first film's opening. Hence the saying "May the Fourth be with you."
There was a time that I shared the joy and love of Star Wars, as readers of his site (or my works) know. That time has long since passed.
Like many relationships, this one died gradually rather than all at once. There wasn't a hateful renunciation and clean breakup so much as a growing sense of weariness and a desire to just get away.
There were fights along the way and we tried to hold it together, but Star Wars and I just got tired of each other. As I've always said, love and hate are two sides of the same coin; the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. I'm indifferent to Star Wars.
The only reason I'm writing this post is that well-meaning friends (who think I'm still on good terms with my ex) keep bringing it up.
I'm reminded of the way Evelyn Waugh describes this process in both Brideshead Revisited and the Sword of Honour trilogy.
At first, there is passion and completion and contentment. But gradually the excitement fades and is replaced by routine, and the desire slowly disappears. He obviously knew a lot about failed relationships, but that's how it is with me and Star Wars.
Still, the memories of my first love sometimes come back, and I think back to all the good times we had together. Ah, to be young and watching the original trilogy on the big screen in first release!
Those were the days.
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